A Lesson from Alice

I give myself very good advice, 
But I very seldom follow it, 
That explains the trouble that I'm always in, 
Be patient, is very good advice, 
But the waiting makes me curious, 
And I'd love the change, 
Should something strange begin, 
Well I went along my merry way, 
And I never stopped to reason, 
I should have know there'd be a price to pay, 
Someday...someday, 
I give myself very good advice, 
But I very seldom follow it, 
Will I ever learn to do the things I should? 
Will I ever learn to do the things I should?

I hear you, Alice. I definitely hear you.....

~Rachel

The Goofy Theory

OH. MY. GOSH.

WHAT IF....

Goofy was madly in love with Mrs. Geef (/Mrs. Goof), and they got married. They must've lived a while together, as they have a son, Max. When Max is too young to remember her, she dies in a car crash (evidenced by the above link).

...What if Goofy's extra-goofy personality was heightened by the tragedy?? I mean, he must've always been a silly fellow before, with a playful, naive personality... but how do you stay goofy after a tragedy like your wife dying?

What if Goofy is still goofy nowadays because he's always drunk to delirium?!? What if he has hangovers off-camera and bouts of depression that Donald and Mickey and Pluto have to go through?!?  What if he doesn't drink, but his goofiness is just a way to cope with his inner turmoil and sorrow?

How does Max deal with his father's depression? Does Max know? Do Goofy's friends even know?? I mean, they must know there was something that happened: Goofy has a son, after all.

Wait.... that also means that a Disney character had to have slept...

No. No no no no no no no no NO. We are leaving that discussion out of this.

SERIOUSLY though: Goofy really needs to see a psychiatrist who will be sworn to secrecy and not ruin his reputation. We all love his silly, happy-go-lucky personality, but when it's faked to the point of extremity? When he's hiding his true feelings and bottling them up like a tornado inside of a gold leaved treasure chest? That's not healthy.

Goofy, be genuine. Talk to someone. Get help. No one should have to suffer alone.

:( <3

~Rachel

Giving Thanks

Thanksgiving is a time of giving thanks, stuffing our faces with delicious food, and spending time with our family. It's become one of my favorite holidays, to be honest: Halloween is too spooky, so it's nice to have another, happier, cozier autumn holiday.

So, what am I thankful for this year?

-My hilarious and loving family
-Theater
-friends
-My own room
-A home
-this laptop
-My school
-clothing
-food
-Music
-My voice
-Disney
-Disneyland
-A boyfriend
-The money I have
-The opportunities I'm given
-My dreams
-My ambitions
-Pumpkin pie
-Gravy to cover up the weird taste of the way-too-smooth mashed potatoes
-Bacon
-The color purple
-The Bible
-Broadway
-hugs
-kisses
-Rain
-Kittens
-Books
-The Internet
-....college apps. It does mean I get to go to college!
-My giant teddy bear
-The quilt I haven't finished
-Shoes
-Being healthy, even though I can be a hypochondriac
-Makeup
-Hair curlers
-My lanyard for my keys (it's very unique)
-Blankets
-Tea
-Coloring books

I think the best way to close this Thanksgiving is taking advantage of those last three things :)

What are you thankful for? I hope your Thanksgiving has been happy!

Heartwarming

Some of the best moments in life are those moments that, for whatever reason, you actually feel in your heart. Those moments when you read or hear or see something sweet, and you can't help but feel that swelling of warmth in your chest and so deep in your gut, it almost brings tears.

Today was the Cast party for Beauty and the Beast, which basically wraps up the entire experience. Each of those kids, especially the smaller ones and my new friends, has always been so wonderful and sweet to me, but for some reason, I received many amazing complements tonight.

It really makes me happy to know people notice my work onstage, and care enough to share it with me.

On top of that is the sudden realization of the impact I've made in some of these kids' lives. I received several hugs, a few girls confessing I was their favorite Silly Girl, a beautiful balloon heart, ....and this note:

"Dear Rachel,

It's official! You are my FAVORITE Silly girl! You're also my favorite beautiful girl. At the dance call backs, I was alone, and then you came! <3 You were my only friend there. And when you saved my sister from getting trampled! You rescued her! Getting trampled is Allie's worst nightmare! Thank you so much for being my friend. You have an amazing voice and you're a spectacular actress! <3 A million thank you's for making this one of my favorite shows of all time! This was a classic and you made it even better! With your amazing talent this show was a blast! Everything with you is a blast! I'm so lucky to have a friend like you!
XOXO, Emily"

....This is the sweetest note I have ever received.

At any audition or callback, I usually make a point out of being social to calm mine and other people's nerves. Emily was particularly quiet at this dance callback, and wasn't around anyone, so naturally, she was my social buddy. She seemed to appreciate the company, so I decided to make a point out of remembering her name and staying around her.
She ended up being cast as a featured dancer: Perfect for her!

I don't remember when I saved her sister from being run over by the mobs of children at the studio, but I did remember Emily's name long after the callback. Throughout the show, I've gotten to spend a lot of time with her and her sister, Allie, and I've found that these girls have a beautiful, genuine sweetness about them I haven't seen in anyone for a long time.

To hear that I made such an impact on them is....inspiring and touching.

You never know how your actions can affect others. Normally, I hear that phrase when I've done something that affects others negatively, and I've heard it can be positive as well, but I never experienced it until now.

Emily, Allie, I don't know if you'll ever read this, but you girls made this show so memorable and fun for me too. Keep at your dreams: You are both princesses.

~Rachel~

Beauty and the Silly Girls

It's me again.

I've been pretty busy these past few weeks because the show I'm in, "Beauty and the Beast," opened. Well, by now we're on our last weekend, and we close tomorrow, but it's not too late to comment on it, right?

Confession: I wanted to be Belle in this show with every ounce of my gut and being. I worked on her songs, analyzed her character, practiced practiced practiced, and I thought I had an awesome shot.

I didn't even get a callback for her.

Really people? It's times like this that make me wonder why the heck I'm even in this business. Is hard work never appreciated? Are dreams just made to be crushed? What influenced this decision? My voice? My looks? My general inability to pull off a really good audition?

Anyways, I play a Silly Girl. You know, those girls that freak out over Gaston and think he's the cats pajamas in order to emphasis to the audience that Belle is really different in not wanting to marry him, as well as to provide a source of comic relief.

You know, these guys.

Except, in our show we have six instead of three. Better harmonies that way, plus it opens up more casting room for those all those Belle hopefuls who didn't make the cut.

Like me.

I mean, sure, it would be nice to be a lead. But it's Belle. She's a Disney Princess, and one of the best ones too. She's intelligent, gorgeous, perceptive, and witty. All she ever wanted was to go somewhere where she didn't feel so alone and strange. We all feel alone sometimes...

Maybe someday, I'll get the chance to be in this show again as this lovely lady. I guess I've got a lot of improvement to do before then.

Being a Silly Girl does have its perks! We six girls have really bonded over the course of the show. Every time we're onstage, we live. it. up. Plus, the Gaston we get to trip over ourselves for is a really good friend of mine. Same with his Le Fou! Both boys are super sweet, and crazy talented. I love that I'm onstage with them in all the scenes I'm in.

Speaking of Le Fou, he had a pretty big scare opening night. During the song "Gaston," he got pushed off Gaston's chair, and slid all the way over to the edge of the stage. Right over an eight-foot orchestra pit with people and instruments below him. He was on his knees, halfway off the stage, and trying to retain his balance for a few split seconds, but managed to get back up and back in character in time for his next solo. We all broke character for a bit, I do admit. It scared the living daylights out of me though!!! I'm so glad he's ok. I think he might've actually enjoyed the attention from the experience, but our Gaston felt so bad: he's the one that pushed Le Fou off the chair in that direction. For the rest of the shows, the push has been in the other direction.

Live theater: Gotta love it.

The kids that see the show are great too. Since it's a Princess story, we get a lot of little kids dressed up as Belle and just gawking at her both before and after the show. It's totally adorable and sweet.

Another Confession: I'm super jealous. But I'm sure you understand based on what I said earlier. 

......It's just so not fair.....Life isn't fair. I ought to get over it.

The leads were all very well cast for this show though. Our Mrs. Potts was my double back when I did "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat," and I had no idea until now what a gorgeous voice she had. All of her solos sound perfect. Our Lumiere and Cogsworth have wonderful stage chemistry together: they're hilarious. The Beast is incredible too. Every time he comes onstage for his first scene, I just get wrapped up in what's happening and I feel like I'm watching the movie. His costume and makeup are pretty amazing too. There's a lot of intricate detail...he really looks like a different creature. 

And of course, my fellow Silly Girls are just amazing. Each one has such unique talent, and I feel really blessed to get to know them. As upset as I was (and still kinda am) about not getting the role I wanted, these girls make it worth the trouble. I guess that's why I love these shows: There's always something wonderful that comes out of them. Even the most disappointing of them.

That there is all of us together, in rainbow order of course! I'm the purple one. I really love purple. Not all of us were prepared for the camera, but hey. It's a cute shot. 

Closing show tomorrow, wish us luck!

Ahem, I mean... tell us to break a leg!!

Night Nausea News

I'm having one of those nights again....

It's 11:12, but my body is used to it being midnight, so I feel really, really sick. I'm nauseous, a little shaky, and my stomach is gurgling. It's probably all because I'm tired, but I'm emetophobic.

Emetophobia: An intense, irrational fear or anxiety pertaining to vomiting.

So naturally, I'm wide awake, freaking out, and having not only extreme tiredness symptoms, but anxiety attack symptoms too. Great.

Might as well take this opportunity to catch up on everything:

1. Halloween
Halloween happened last week! I hope yours was happy and safe! I didn't do much honestly, except my Youth Group had a Halloween hang-out where we usually meet, which was really fun! I wore an outfit representing Princess Buttercup in this fashion:

It wasn't too impressive. Basically all I did was wear a white long-sleeved shirt with a white skirt, and put a sparkly light blue and purple tank top over it. Pin a white flowy scarf to my shirt, stick on a tiara, and voila! I should've curled my hair, but oh well.

The original plan for Halloween had been to dress up as an old lady (I had a friend who was going to be an old man with me) and walk around from house to house with a door frame. Our door would have a sign that said "Knock," and when the people did, we would open the door and reverse trick or treat them: complement them on their "costumes," hand them candy, shut the door, pick the door up, and leave. Wouldn't that be awesome?! Maybe next year....

Anyways, I saw the movie "Nightmare Before Christmas" for the first time! I liked the story, but it was still pretty creepy... maybe it was just the Claymation. I'm not a claymation fan. Looking at it for too long just makes me feel sick. Not sure why..... Sally and Oogie Boogey creeped me out especially.

Ew. Gross.

2. My very last cross-country meet
Basically, I ran three miles in 26 minutes and only walked three times. I got a personal record for the course with a 2 min 36 second improvement. I feel very proud of myself. Then, since I'm a senior, I got a rose, and my coach introduced me to the other schools as the team's Disney Princess. Why yes, I did feel awesome, thank you very much.

3. Aladdin
The Junior Highers at my school performed Disney's "Aladdin Jr." for their musical this year, and a good friend of mine played Princess Jasmine. The show as a whole was absolutely ADORABLE and wonderful! As a Disney and Aladdin fan, I was thoroughly pleased.

Alas, the show had no Abu

After the show though, my Princess Jasmine friend was swarmed with a huge crowd of family, friends, and seniors that know her. I think she was quite overwhelmed.... poor thing. She was fabulous though!!!

The other characters I was super impressed with were the Genie and the Carpet. The Genie was played by this hoot of a sixth grader who just mastered Genie's attitude and joke telling. I still can't believe she's a pixie. Holy Cow.
I was told before I saw the show that the carpet was a super gymnast. I wasn't sure what to expect before the show, but man, she was. She was tumbling all over the place like a bouncy ball. Plus, she was super adorable!!!

There are so many more highlights from the show I could talk about, but my point is it was adorable, I'm super proud of the kids I knew, and I'm so grateful that our drama department has a future!!!

4. Tech Week!!!!
Tech week for the show I'm in starts TOMORROW. Yikes!!!

Well, not yet. Day one is always super boring, and by now, the only reason I look forward to going is to see who wins the Gypsy Robe Award. Otherwise, it's a safety lecture and committee meetings. Ho Hum.

The Gypsy Robe Award, by the way, is a tradition that some smaller theatre companies follow that started on Broadway. A member of the Ensemble is given a robe, and instantly becomes a good luck charm (it's good luck to hug the Gypsy Robe Winner before the show). Then, they add a patch for the show they won the award in onto the robe. It can turn out really beautiful!

Or...weird... like this one.... Your choice, really

I won the robe when I was in seventh grade for "Oliver!" My patch ended up being on the pocket of the robe, where I had a traditional picture representing the show, but there was a cord that led into the pocket attached to a wallet full of fake money and a show ticket stub. You could take the wallet in and out. If you've seen the show, you'll get this :)


5. College apps
They're stressful, they're annoying, and they're taking forever to finish. That's all.

Well... I'm feeling a little better now... maybe just because I finally got something on this website. Maybe I'm just feeling better.

I'm going to go to bed and hope that I'm not sick now... *sigh*. Phobias suck.

~Rachel~

High School says I'm stupid

Only high school can make you feel like an idiot. Even when you're taking almost all honors and AP classes, getting great SAT scores, being well-known among adults as an intelligent and capable teenager, and making pretty good decisions in your life.

"Nope," high school says, "you're stupid."

"You're supposed to write this type of essay for your college applications: Make it a fun story, but not a generic story like service trips and sports. Make sure its lighthearted, unless you're a serious person. But don't be too serious, the readers get really bored with serious essays and they won't like you if they read something like that. You have to fit exactly who you are as a person, and it has to be a good person, in five hundred words, and it has to be better than anyone else in the country's. Make sure you start months in advance, doing a draft every night, and having everyone you know and love on planet Earth read and check it for you and make sure it's adequate.
Then submit it. Maybe. If the school is looking for that sort of thing.
And remember: College is all about your decisions, not theirs."

.......

"But high school," I say, "nobody's perfect. I wrote my fourth version of a college essay, and it wasn't too hilarious, but it did explain to colleges the quirks I have, and what I think about them. I told them about my determination and ambition, and how I'm excited for the college experience. Is that good enough?"

......
.....
.....
"High school?..... Youu still there?"
......
.....
.....
"Ooook.... I definitely feel done with this essay. It's good enough, and I don't want to work on it anymore. I've only got a certain amount of time left anyways. So... here goes," and I submit the essay.

"WAAIIITTT!!!" Here comes High School, careening out of its nap, "Did you talk to a counselor first?!?!"

....."Damnit High School!!!! Why didn't you wake up and tell me that earlier!!!"

"I did. I told you to show it to everyone you know on Planet Earth."

"YOU COULD HAVE BEEN MORE SPECIFIC!!!"

"Oh... well.... sorry. But you'd better hope and pray that your essay's going to beat everyone else's in the country now. It's probably not good enough. You don't work well under all this pressure. Poor thing. Have some more homework."

"Thanks for the extra pressure of the homework and the... the... college...pressure....added..."

"You aren't very eloquent, are you? Tsk tsk tsk. I hope the colleges didn't notice."

At this point, I'm boiling mad, but maybe High School is right. Maybe I didn't actually do well enough... What if I was supposed to send it to more people than just my parents and my friends who know me well in order to look it over... I mean, my mom only graduated with a communications degree... and all four of them know me well...

But it was too serious. It wasn't stand-outish enough. Or was it?

And what about this supplement essay I'm wanting to send? It's about a service trip... does it answer the prompt well enough? Should I rewrite it all over again even though I had to sacrifice doing nearly all my homework just to get it done? There's no one around to check it either, and I don't have English class tomorrow.... I ought to just rewrite it....

But I can't rewrite what I've already submitted....

"It's not too late! Have people check it again," High School chimes in above my thoughts.

"It's too late, dingbat. I already submitted it. I can't make any changes anymore."

"Well, you're screwed then. Have fun while I go favorite all of these other students who are better than you... No offense. You're great the way you are."

"....Sure. I believe you.... have fun while I wallow in self-doubt and denial"

The problem is, I believe every word he says. High School taught me how to read Shakespeare, how to do Algebra... He's been by my side for four years now. I've got to trust he knows what he's talking about, right??

....My essay should've been perfect. Now I fail at life and I'm never going to college.

Isn't that ironic? There's nothing like High School to make you feel like you're not ready for college....
maybe I'm not as clever as I thought I was...

I guess High School didn't teach me enough about doing everything I'm supposed to do....

~Rachel~

Jump on the wagon...

GO GIANTS!!!

World Series sweep? I think yes. In between doing college apps, hating college apps, and eating too much, I caught bits and pieces of the game. It was pretty intense! I'm just glad it all turned out well at the end :)

Still, it would've been nice if they had won at home... Spectacular, nonetheless. I'm proud to be from nearby their town.

Woo Hoo!!!

.....Ok. Can I stop pretending I know anything about baseball teams now?

Yes? You sure? Ok, good....

Whenever I talk about sports, I feel like this:

...."Is everybody gone?"..... That's from Toy Story 2 by the way.

See, I'm what they call a Bandwagon fan. Whoever's the most popular, awesome! I'm all for them! Go Giants! Go Sharks! Go Yankees! Go 49ers! Go __insert popular team here__.

Because of where I'm from, the Giants and the Sharks are the biggies. Because they're so popular, I like them now too. I'm not sure why, but I just do.

Now, there is one BIG exception: The Super Bowl. I never have certain, favorite football teams, but when the Super Bowl comes around, I always make my own prediction on who will win, and I stick with it. I've been right the past 3 years, so I like to continue my streak. If you're planning to bet this year, check back: hopefully I'll be right again.

By the way, while I was trying to find that Barbie video, I came across this:

How ADORABLE is that?!?! It may be one of my new favorite Youtube videos.

So, readers, Are you a legitimate sports fan? Or do you jump on bandwagons like me? Either way, what teams do you support?

Or, what's your favorite song from The Little Mermaid? I love "Poor Unfortunate Souls" and the reprise of "Part of Your World."

~Rachel~

"Be Our guest, be our guest....."

I swear I have every single song from Beauty and the Beast stuck in my head right now, all at the same time.

Namely, "Be Our Guest."

There's additional lyrics in the musical that aren't in the movie too. Namely, "It's a treat for any diner. Don't believe me? Ask the china!"

OK. OK. I'll be your guest!!! Sheesh. I'm not even Belle!!

I do adore Disney, but any song stuck in my head this long is gonna drive me nuts.

Singing, Costumes, and Peanuts

You know that awesome moment when you've learned the harmony to a song, and someone else has learned the other part of the song, and then you sing it together somewhat unplanned and it sounds AWESOME?

That happened today. It looked like this:

Except I'm not a cat. And neither is my friend Charles, who I sang with. But the expression is basically the same.
We also started singing random stuff from The Phantom of the Opera, and he told me about a time in South Africa when he got to see the show with an amazing view, flawless talent, stunning special effects, and for only $40.
I melted of jealousy.

Speaking of jealousy though, Halloween is coming up, and so are Costume Parties! Yay! I went to one tonight that my entire class was invited to. I showed up late (rehearsal), but in the time I was there I saw some pretty incredible costumes. I am so jealous of the creativity of these people!!! Not to mention some of the costume pieces themselves were pretty amazing.
They included...
-A legittimate Princess Peach dress with Mario
-Sushi
-The Blue Fairy
-Mulan
-The Firefox logo
-Alvin and the Chipmunks
-A traditional Indian outfit
-TinTin
-Popeye
-Captain Jack Sparrow
And many, many more.

The costumes that I envy most are usually those with the long, flowing, royal-looking dresses. Those types of outfits are just so much fun to wear! Sometimes I wish that women still wore things like that as part of the fashion. Wouldn't it be amazing to go to every party in a full-on ball gown? *sigh*

Also, you know when you've already picked out a costume, and you're at a party, but seeing everyone else suddenly gives you tons of much better costume ideas??? Next year, I'm going to get a group of friends of mine to be Peanuts characters with me. I think I can pull off Sally Brown.

Isn't she cute?

I went to this party in a make-shift Princess Jasmine outfit. The tiger that I carried with me helped people figure it out. :)

For actual Halloween though, I've been scheming with one of my friends, and we've got an even better idea.... Stay tuned!

In the meantime though, who's your favorite Peanuts character? I'm torn between Linus and Snoopy.

~Rachel~